Christian Manhood

I've been thinking about manhood; Christian manhood, which is the manhood I know. I've been seriously and very imperfectly following Christ most of my adult life. And I was being dragged to church before that; before  I was launched from the nest and drifted into an unanchored young adulthood which led me into a very dry land.  When this dryness sent me searching seriously for the Truth that I sensed, on a deep level, that I needed, I found The Oasis with Living Water: Jesus Christ. So what I know, inwardly, is Christian manhood. That's what I've been thinking about. Manhood is sometimes being like a lone wolf; alone in the wilderness of human interactions. Even those we thought we knew and were trying to love (not very proficiently) became like strangers--like two lone wolves passing on a trail, feeling threatened and defensive. Sometimes we are misunderstood; sometimes we behave badly. We try to behave better, taking responsibility. And we realize that we also misunderstand others. In the lone wolf phases, we realize how men, without Christ, could become bitter, angry and hateful. A major headline in the news this day is  a massacre in a Texas church--more than 25 dead, others in critical condition--committed by a man who was apparently striking back in revenge against his ex-wife and her family. He was tired of being a lone wolf. He decided to kill some people whom, in his deluded, unenlightened mind, he believed were responsible for his unending pain, then exit this world himself. I hear near-death experiencers describe visits to hell with places for people like him. Or maybe God will know what we cannot: that he is not fit for responsibility. I trust the God who made me and all of us to know exactly how to handle him. And I know that He is Love, as my Lord has taught me. And so I am thankful that I can forgive; and be forgiven. And for the peace that that brings into my soul. So the lone wolf, no matter how far from the warmth of the pack, is always ready to serve and to lead. But his leadership is not dominating or controlling; it is servant leadership. He is not dominated by his needs or his desires. He does not react against being disrespected. He quickly gives to God, and thereby lets go of, hurt and anger before it turns to hostility. He finds his source of confidence, not in how well he is being treated by his family or life in general,  but in how well he is loving his people--those in his circle of influence. He remembers that this Love--the Love of Christ--is the main agenda. He remembers because he has, in the past, suffered the pain of forgetting--the pain of the suffering he brought to those he loves.  He hates that pain with a holy hatred that fuels, like fire, the determination to get this as right as he can possibly get it: This is about Love! He shouts it in his mind because he has seen how slippery, fickle and vain his thoughts can be; like precious energy burning out of control, not driving anything--or at least anything good.  Some of those thoughts are embarrassingly evil; something he may keep secret from everyone but God. Nothing is secret to God; and he knows it. And he knows that God is holding him accountable for whether or not he moves a little closer every day to the Love of Christ for all his people--whether he is enhancing their lives or draining them--being an agent of healing or hurt. He is actually mindful of this; he prays about it; seeks and receives the honest and compassionate feedback he gets from God through the Holy Spirit. Receives grace and forgiveness for his failures and thereby lives peacefully with a perfect God--a perfect Spirit residing within his imperfect self--cleansed from all unrighteousness--free. Free to Love.
     There is still suffering. There is always suffering in this world. We can't escape it. We can only pray to suffer rightly--for the right reasons. Not selfishly. And we pray that our suffering will have the effect that God, Who in His Love allows it, intends it to have. We realize that, no matter how profound our suffering, God is good, and good can come from it, and we can always choose how to respond. We are not victims! We suffer, along with Christ, in His Spirit, with the sufferings of our spouse, children, loved ones---the world. But we suffer in faith and hope and love. And there is a mysterious peace, like an unshakable  foundation, underneath it all.  We understand, experientially, how the same Jesus who said "My soul is sorrowful, even unto death" could say "My peace I give to you". We feel guilt and shame, fear and dread and doubt being burned away in the Consuming Fire that is drawing us into it like an eternal Light of Love, Peace and Joy. We become like a beneficent king--the king of our domain. We love all in our sphere of influence, and those outside it as well. We have good will toward all. We are joyful servants of God and man. We are not trying to control, use or impress people any more; only love them. We recognize evil; in our own sinful nature and in the world. We see how the evil prince of this world has infiltrated the minds and hearts of humankind. Our eyes are open to the realm of spirit. We fear no evil, knowing that the One who has overcome all of it is with us and in us forever. We have unshakable confidence in Him, knowing that He loves others as much as us--even those who hate Him. But, in Him, we are not manipulated by evil. We are not pawns in Satan's game, and we do not bow to those who are. We shine light into his darkness. We live in eternity with the eternal God. Our lives on this earth are directed toward sowing seeds of Truth--His Truth--the Truth of Christ. God is Love, and in Him we become Love; eternal Love, with its many faces, colors and manifestations. We are free with the only true freedom that exists. We are no longer vulnerable to what Satan can do, even through those in our own household! because we love them no matter what. We do not need them to bolster our egos or confirm our manhood by respecting us properly. We realize that our Lord was not respected properly, yet overcame in Love; and we feel His power within us, enabling us to overcome also, day by day. We accept, with a good heart, that life on earth will never be easy. And we embrace death as a transition into a glorious realm beyond human words to describe.
     Mature manhood has a deep and sincere respect and admiration for womanhood, bordering on reverence because he recognizes her to be a gift from God--literally.  A clear perception of womanhood causes a man to be thankful to God. In the creation, God said "It is not good for man to be alone. I will give him a helper." And He created a being, in His own image, who was  wired with a bent toward Love, who was more naturally inclined to give, serve, help, make sacrifices, not compete, be content in the background, nurture, etc.  Someone who could actually love a man--something that is hard for a mature man to understand, except as a gift from God--a physical manifestation of His love. And, historically, what has man done with this great gift? We have subjugated her because she was physically weaker and by nature submissive to man. We have abused her and used her for our selfish desires. We gave her the right to vote in America in 1920, after a long battle against those who thought it was "too extreme".  An interesting read:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women%27s_suffrage_in_the_United_States
It should not surprise us that such a movement as "Feminism" should arise; or that some women become lesbians, unable to trust man, let alone desire to be with him. Some reactions, however, to evil become a different kind of evil. It is as incumbent upon woman to love man, as for him to love her. God forbids us to "return evil for evil." We're all in this together. The extreme failure of one human being to love can wreak havoc and inflict much unnecessary suffering in the lives of many people. The Texas massacre is an example of this.  We must be conscious and proactive in propagating the Kingdom. Evangelism and proselytizing are labeled and stigmatized as something to deride. They are the fruit of  spiritual maturity--God's Love being offered through a brother or sister--the aroma of love and freedom wafting through the human family. Some catch a whiff, follow it, and find abundant and eternal life--move from zombie-land into the free world of the Kingdom.
If you are not in the Kingdom, you should be scared.  John Newton penned in the profound hymn, Amazing Grace, "Twas grace that taught my heart to fear." That fear is rational if you are not in the Kingdom. That fear is the voice of a loving God calling you into freedom and divine love. The only way out is to listen to that Voice. It is the voice of love--the love of Jesus Christ. If you don't know Him, you should be scared. Because it is only in Him that we find the grace which relieves all our fears ("And grace my fears relieved.") "Perfect love drives out fear." (1John 4:18). Mature men seek always to abide in this love--in Christ who lives in us.