Truth and Freedom

Jesus said "If you continue in my way, you will know the TRUTH and it will set you free." It will lead you into an awareness of the freedom that you have had from creation. You were created free, and innocent. But you did not know freedom and innocence, because you were lost in it—found, but lost—like a fish does not know water. You had to lose freedom and innocence in order to know that they exist. They never stopped existing, but you got lost from them—lost in the world. Jesus, like a good Shepherd, comes out into that world and rescues you. He brings you home to an awareness of the freedom of the TRUTH. The TRUTH has always been and will always be what it is—glorious beyond imagination. You cannot change the TRUTH, you can simply wake up to it. This is God's will for you. To wake up. When you wake up, you realize that you are free—from death, hell, fear, worry, and all that is oppressive. Jesus said, I come to release you from all oppression. He is indeed a Good Shepherd. He gives His life for His sheep. There is no greater Love than this.

Many are living their lives in the distractions of the world. If they would pay close attention to their inner being, they would realize that these distractions are not fulfilling them—they are dissatisfied in their core. St. Augustine was correct when he said “You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you. “

Jesus brings us into this rest. This place of rest is our true home. Thus we sing songs about coming home. We still get distracted by the world, but underneath we know all is well because we have come to know that this TRUTH does not change when we are distracted from it. We always wake up—and smile, along with God, Who is smiling with us. All is well. Love and peace come naturally here because we are at one with God Who is Love and Peace.

God is now and has always been giving you everything you need. As you draw near to God, you discover that you can live your life with open heart like open hands. You are not resisting anything, and you are not striving toward anything except the increase of this Truth that brings freedom and peace to more and more awakening souls.

Marriage Building: Relational Home

BUILDING A RELATIONAL HOME

1. Commit to stay in and especially to GROW in the relationship.

Vows? Intentions? Vision? Close the “exits”-- external and in the mind.

2. Get to know [and diligently avoid] the “Four Horsemen of Marital Apocalypse”

Defensiveness. Criticism. Stonewalling. Contempt. [Gottmans]

3. Learn to manage personal feelings. Stay out of the “Red Zone”.

Self-soothing. Inner sanctuary. Empathy and Compassion.

4. Learn to communicate

“When you...I feel...What I want is….” “This is what I heard you say...”

90% listening, 10% speaking. Seek to understand more than to be understood. Understanding does not equal agreeing. Get to know your growing and changing mate. Assume the best, not worst.

5. Learn to manage conflict. Collaborate vs. Dictate. Seek and give forgiveness. Accept influence.

(handout)

6. Create a better life together. Stay in touch with what is and has been good in the relationship. Nurture fondness and admiration. Learn, or re-learn how to be a good friend to your mate. Be thankful for your mate and all the good he/she brings into your life. EXPRESS the gratitude--- say the words. Make your heart a safe place for your mate.

7. Discover and cultivate the Shared Spiritual Life. Work together to do some good in the world. Practice Love in the broader sense. “For God so loved the world….”

A common error in relationships is an emphasis on trying to get one's mate to love him/her better rather than focusing on loving one's mate better. The need to be loved can dominate and overshadow the ability to love. Early deprivation generates a vacuous need to be loved that precludes the ability to love. Philippians 4:19 speaks to this. 

Ego

Here's one of the ways the ego works to keep us enslaved and spiritually retarded:  The ego will only listen deeply to and receive from someone that is perceived to be equal to or inferior to itself. If the ego suspects that another is more advanced than itself, envy consumes it and it begins to look for fault in that other to assuage its painful sense of inferiority, which it cannot tolerate. This prevents that egoic soul from receiving any liberating Truth. The ego is always comparing itself to others, and only feels comfortable [and receptive] when it thinks it's in the superior position.

Paradox

From an old Puritan prayer book called The Valley of Vision: 

Let me learn by paradox
that the way down is the way up,
that to be low is to be high,
that the broken heart is the healed heart,
that the contrite spirit is the rejoicing spirit,
that the repenting soul is the victorious soul,
that to have nothing is to possess all,
that to bear the cross is to wear the crown,
that to give is to receive,
that the valley is the place of vision.

Depression: Fighting Back

Here are some suggestions that will push back the darkness of depression. Try to practice them every day whether you feel like it or not. Blessings.

GRAPES is a mnemonic acronym for

• G is for be Gentle to yourself / Practice Gratitude
  
• R is for Relaxation
  
• A is for Accomplishment
  
• P is for Pleasure
  
• E is for Exercise
  
• S is for Social / Spiritual

“I try to do all of these every day of my life, whether or not I am depressed. GRAPES really works for me. For example, I might pay some bills, do my laundry, or clean my kitchen - that would be an accomplishment. And I might go to the local donut shop or coffeehouse to socialize there with friends or strangers. Or I might call up a friend and go for a brisk walk in the park for an hour - that would be both social and exercise, or just exercise if I walk alone which is also fine. The more of these I do the better I feel, though I know from experience that accomplishment and social are the most effective for me. Sounds like a pain in the ass, right? Well, it's not; it now comes naturally to me to do all six every day, and it makes a big difference.” {A testimony}
Elaborating on these activities:
Gentle with yourself: One aspect of depressive toxicity is negative self-talk; down-putting, self-critical thoughts. The first step is to become aware of your thoughts. Then practice getting outside the stream of negative or useless thinking into a place of deep self-acceptance, receiving forgiveness, and feeling the Love of God. This is a process. Be patient with yourself. Gratitude: The Bible teaches us to be thankful in all situations [1Thes.5:18]. This is a choice that, when made consistently, lifts our souls heavenward.
Relaxation: Peace is not an illusion; it is real and attainable. Jesus said “Peace I give to you. My peace I give to you; not as the world gives.” Jn 14:27 Be still and know that He is God. Psalm 46:10. Immerse yourself in nature. Look for beauty. Breathe deep. In the universal sense, all is well in Christ.
Accomplishment: Every day do something that manifests what you value most in life. Be a physical manifestation of your values. Get something done, no matter how small.
Pleasure: Enjoy something every day: Nature. Children. Pet/s. Notice the Beauty all around you. Inspirational literature. Music. A pleasant conversation. Food.  etc.
Exercize: Your body is built for movement. The pleasure chemicals in the brain are released with physical activity. Listen to your body and give it what it needs. Feel the wonder of your body. Don't be critical of the shape or condition of your body; be thankful for the miracle that it is!
Social/Spiritual: We live in the context of relationships, and none of us does well in isolation. Stay connected with God and with friends with whom you can be authentic. If you are driving your friends away with negativity, get some therapy. Dump and process your negativity with the therapist and learn how to be a better friend. If there is anything between you and God, process through it. Remember God loves you more than you have ever or will ever love anyone; whether you can feel it or not! Love someone.

The Quiet Place

There is a quiet place within like an oasis in the deserts of the soul; like a cabin in the mountains or a solitary cottage by the ocean, like a clean, fresh forest.
In this place the smoke of this world is gently cleared away by the breath of the Holy Spirit, and lucidity arises like the dawning of the sun, shining brighter and brighter.
In this ever-new clarity, the meanings of the words "peace, freedom, abundant life, joy and love" are experienced as palpable, inner reality. Those words--the reality of them--are like colors in the rainbow, but in this place they are experienced holistically, like white Light.
Here all the secret, hidden, known or unknown desires of the soul are fulfilled. Here we merge with the God of this universe, or rather discover at a deepening level of the soul, our perpetual at-one-ment with Him/Her. Jesus is experienced here as our Friend. His Grace covers all our continuing character flaws--obliterates them like light obliterates darkness.  We may or may not experience ecstacy, and we continue to be imperfect human beings with character defects, and we continue to have the tribulations that Jesus plainly told us we would have; but it does not matter! We know  that everything is exactly perfect! The universe is in the domain of its God Who is Love. The darkness is being allowed because of All-Powerful  Love.  We embrace and are embraced by Eternal Life.  We are, even now, in Eternity; at one with Eternity and the Universe, through Christ in us and in God. Now we proceed in peaceful Love, Compassion, Kindness, Strength and Truth. And even though we cannot remain in this Lucidity, as the disciples could not remain on the Mount of Transfiguration, we have the unshakable foundation of this Truth underneath us as we walk through all of life's dark valleys and challenges. We ongoingly experience foretastes of the Heaven that lies ahead and that secretly embraces, permeates and transcends all of life; the Light that shines secretly and peacefully in the heart, even when it cannot be seen with the eyes.

Life--Valuing and Living It

Take a moment to get in touch with the value of your life. How valuable is your life? And the lives of your loved ones? Think of your "awesomely made" body; your mysterious and wonderful mind. Feel the beating of your faithful, consistent heart, pushing life-nourishing blood through your veins, into capillaries, supplying each one of your 120 trillion cells, each of which is a microscopic universe of life supporting activity in which warfare is conducted against harmful invaders; proteins produced, cells replicated.  You are being sustained, maintained and protected by your cells as they work together collaboratively with the single goal of keeping you alive and conscious! You are a conglomerate of living systems working harmoniously to keep you alive. You had absolutely nothing to do with this miraculous gift, but you use your mysterious, powerful mind to enhance or deter it through the lifestyles you choose; the choices you make; the very thoughts that you think.

     Most of this goes on unnoticed; but I am asking you to notice it. The deeper you go into awareness of your life and the biological and psychological processes of your life, of life itself, the more amazed you will become. The more gifted you will feel. And thankful to the Giver. This is an aspect of maturity.
I don't want to wait until I or someone I love gets the big, bad diagnosis or has a life-threatening accident to get in touch with the value of my life and the lives of my loved ones. I want to embrace the miraculous gift of life on this incredibly beautiful and life-sustaining earth every day--every moment if possible. I will not fear death [I know that life continues beyond it] but I will allow it to evoke within me the gift of valuing life on this earth, and doing my best to be a good steward of my allotted time here. And for me that means bringing as much of the Love and Truth of Jesus Christ into this world as possible. I have spent some time trying to think of a better way to live, and I cannot.

The Arena of Love and Truth

If you are in the arena of human endeavor, trying to bring more love and truth into the world, you will make some mistakes. And those little souls, sitting on the sidelines, will delight in pointing them out and harping on them. Your brothers and sisters, however--those who are also in the arena--will encourage you, forgive and be gracious to you, because they are aware of the mistakes they have made in this great endeavor. We must not waste our time being indignant toward those on the sidelines, nor trying to defend ourselves against their persistent accusations, which would simply distract us from the needed efforts. We have compassion for them, pray for them, invite them into the the joyful endeavor, remembering that they "know not what they do." Then we carry on. Jesus did not chase Judas around trying to get him to "get it." And He did not dance around, trying to dodge the bullets of criticism and threats of heresy (punishable by death in His culture) that were being hurled at Him by the powerful, "religious" elites of His culture.

Authority of Mind

How do you want to feel?  Feel that way!
What thoughts do you prefer to think? Think those thoughts!
What do you want to do with your frustration and anger? Do it! [But do not sin!]
How much peace do you desire?  Receive it!  It is a gift!
How free do you want to feel?  Wake up! You are free!
How much love do you want to receive?  Give that much and you will discover that you receive it!

If you cannot do these things, recognize that there are forces beyond you that control or influence you. [Who has authority of your mind and heart?] Jesus will enable you to master these forces. 

Or you may continue to suffer. You are free to do so.