Love and Respect in Marriage

I was going to write about love and respect but I found an article that expresses it beautifully. [below link]  The only other thing I would point out is the vicious cycle generated by spouses when they do not love and respect each other. As the article points out, biblically speaking, men are to love  their wives, and wives to respect their husbands. Men need respect, women need love. It is hard for a man to love a woman who does not respect him; and it is hard for a woman to respect a man with whom she feels unloved. So you see the downward spiral this could create. It can be reversed by either partner who is willing to practice the required discipline even if his/her spouse is not practicing it. This is not something to be tried once or twice and then collapse into "This is not working!" It's a good practice even your spouse never responds positively. It's good for you. It's God's will for us to "love our enemies" and to not return evil for evil. You become a better person when you do not allow your spouses' failures to determine your attitude and behavior.  This does not mean that one should tolerate and submit to chronic abuse. Abuse should be sternly confronted; and the abusive partner must come to understand the counter-productive outcome of abuse and discipline him/herself to eradicate abusive behaviors, words, gestures and even attitudes from his/her personality. This is the work of the Holy Spirit--very important work! It is work motivated by love, even for the abuser. We don't stop loving our mate with Christ's Love when they lapse into abuse, because Christ doesn't stop loving them. But we must be careful to protect ourselves, and especially our children from abuse. Love is manifested as a strong intolerance for abuse.
Read more in the below well-written article.

https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/love-and-respect